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You are here: Home / Communication and Consultation / Living In Glass Houses

Living In Glass Houses

October 21, 2015 by Admin 4 Comments

Living In Glass Houses – The real risk in casting the first stone.

Depositphotos_64346751_s-2015This an article slightly different to what we usually post and I hope you do what I did, and read it a few times to really get the deep meaning within it. When I met Ben earlier this year, there is no way I would have expected something like this from him. However, since starting his Post Grad Studies in The Social Psychology of Risk, he has obviously become not only Risk Savvy but also more Emotionally Intelligent – as he recently said to me: “I can’t and don’t want to stop learning, I am a better person for it. Funny that I’ve had to learn about others to learn the most about me”

Ben explains the background to this response: “This came about as I sent the safety walk minutes out on the Monday instead of the Friday prior when the walk happens. The walk on this particular Friday was started at 2pm as opposed to 10am. I hadn’t worked that weekend either. On the Monday there was an incident which took up the entire day so I got to doing the safety walk minutes at 9pm Monday night. Something the individual who replied ALL didn’t notice. In this REPLY ALL email it was asked of me to ‘please get the minutes out on the Friday’!”.

Living In Glass Houses – The real risk in casting the first stone.

by Ben Armstrong

Do you know what you’ve said? Do you think you’re better than me? Are you in the mindset that you are superior to me? What makes you feel this way? Did I say something wrong and now you feel you have to punish or belittle me in front of all or even reply to all on an email. Who are you and what makes you so perfect? Were you pushed or taught to be infallible? How hard is it to be you in a room full of people? You’re the expert!

I’m not going to answer all those questions as they are my emotions effected by your actions. You’re the expert. You’re the leader. Maybe you’re not that smart and this is your way of feeling better about yourself as “you got one up on me” – “Ha Hahhh I got you now”?………. No you don’t……….I see you. You are in my line of sight, you’re not my target but I see 360 degrees….. You see, I’m behind a barrier of glass …… I’m also in a glass house …… I am not going to reply all, I am not going to retaliate…..you see I’m an introvert,…I also want to protect the inside of my house from you and everyone. You can’t see me because your house is fogged up with your excited breath and anxiety towards life…….how do I tell you to stop? Why should I? you don’t understand me and I am the best follower a leader could have……..but you…..you feel I’m insignificant or just a barnacle on the ship of success and you make me feel like an anchor. Should I confront you, no… you would just light me up in front of everyone like the Vegas strip. No I will let you know another way cause you don’t realise how strategic I am, I know the playing field cause I observe from behind my glass house, I am transparent, there are some cracks in my glass house but none that leak….you are wide open and ……I see you . You are unaware of these feelings but look at what you have surfaced, my deepest emotions brought to you by your one remark. You want me to help you, you want me to support you in your daily functions, you want, you want…. Leaders don’t want do they?? Leaders do…..that’s right! Leaders provide, Leaders help, and Leaders oversee all………like 360 degrees standing in a glass house …..transparent and seen.

I get it now…….I am the Leader…… that’s why I won’t laugh in your face when I realised this, but it is why I will be strategic in helping you feel satisfied in your position …in your glass house. I’m coming, I’m on my way, I’m here and how can I help!!.

Ben A.

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Filed Under: Communication and Consultation, Social Psychology of Risk Tagged With: emotional intelligence, glass houses

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