• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

Safety Risk .net

Humanising Safety and Embracing Real Risk

  • Home
    • About
      • Privacy Policy
      • Contact
  • FREE RESOURCES
    • FREE SAFETY eBOOKS
    • FREE DOWNLOADS
    • TOP 50
    • FREE RISK ASSESSMENT FORMS
    • Find a Safety Consultant
    • Free Safety Program Documents
    • Psychology Of Safety
    • Safety Ideas That Work
    • HEALTH and SAFETY MANUALS
    • FREE SAFE WORK METHOD STATEMENT RESOURCES
    • Whats New In Safety
    • FUN SAFETY STUFF
    • Health and Safety Training
    • SAFETY COURSES
    • Safety Training Needs Analysis and Matrix
    • Top 20 Safety Books
    • This Toaster Is Hot
    • Free Covid-19 Toolbox Talks
    • Download Page – Please Be Patient With Larger Files…….
    • SAFETY IMAGES, Photos, Unsafe Pictures and Funny Fails
    • How to Calculate TRIFR, LTIFR and Other Health and Safety Indicators
    • Download Safety Moments from Human Resources Secretariat
  • PSYCH. OF SAFETY & RISK
    • Safety Psychology Terminology
    • Some Basics on Social Psychology & Risk
    • Understanding The Social Psychology of Risk – Prof Karl E. Weick
    • The Psychology of Leadership in Risk
    • Conducting a Psychology and Culture Safety Walk
    • The Psychology of Conversion – 20 Tips to get Started
    • Understanding The Social Psychology of Risk And Safety
    • Psychology and safety
    • The Psychology of Safety
    • Hot Toaster
    • TALKING RISK VIDEOS
    • WHAT IS SAFETY
    • THE HOT TOASTER
    • THE ZERO HARM DEBATE
    • SEMIOTICS
    • LEADERSHIP
  • Robert Long
    • ALL POSTS
    • Learning Styles Matter
    • There is no HIERARCHY of Controls
    • Scaffolding, Readiness and ZPD in Learning
    • What Can Safety Learn From Playschool?
    • Presentation Tips for Safety People
    • Dialogue Do’s and Don’ts
    • It’s Only a Symbol
    • Ten Cautions About Safety Checklists
    • Zero is Unethical
    • First Report on Zero Survey
    • There is No Objectivity, Deal With it!
  • Quotes & Slogans
    • Researchers Reveal the Top 10 Most Effective Safety Slogans Of All Time
    • When Slogans Don’t Work
    • CLASSIC, FAMOUS and INFAMOUS SAFETY QUOTES
    • BEST WORKPLACE HEALTH and SAFETY SLOGANS 2022
    • CATCHY and FUNNY SAFETY SLOGANS FOR THE WORKPLACE
    • COVID-19 (Coronavirus, Omicron) Health and Safety Slogans and Quotes for the Workplace
    • Safety Acronyms
    • You know Where You Can Stick Your Safety Slogans
    • Sayings, Slogans, Aphorisms and the Discourse of Simple
    • Spanish Safety Slogans – Consignas de seguridad
    • Safety Slogans List
    • Road Safety Slogans 2022
    • How to write your own safety slogans
    • Why Are Safety Slogans Important
    • Safety Slogans Don’t Save Lives
    • 40 Free Safety Slogans For the Workplace
    • Safety Slogans for Work
  • Safety Culture
    • Safety Culture Silences
You are here: Home / Safety Professional / Template – Zero Harm Advisor

Template – Zero Harm Advisor

July 9, 2020 by Barry Spud 10 Comments

Depositphotos_54649341_s-2015In the interests of supporting the safety industry, we here at Safetyrisk provide hundreds of templates to save you time searching and money. So the following template is provided at no cost for any of those zero organisations seeking a zero harm advisor. Feel free to use the complementary template and good luck.

Position Deception

Zero Harm Advisor

  1. Demonstrated life long record of no mistakes, slips, misses or errors
  2. Ability to terminate employees who make mistakes
  3. Capability to attribute good management and performance to no injuries and blame aberrations for any injury
  4. Demonstrated ability o hide injury data, fudge statistics and shift harm to no countable causes
  5. Ability to overlook harm in mental health, well being and non visible harm caused by the workplace
  6. Demonstrated ability to pump out zero slogans and mantras like religious clockwork
  7. Demonstrated ability to deny fallibility

Essential Criteria

  1. Must be a member of a zero harm association eg. AIHS, NSCA, ASSP
  2. Must have a Diploma in ZH from an accredited ZH provider
  3. Undertake full medical assessment and be in perfect health
  4. Must be able to walk on water as required

If you cannot meet all of these criteria do not apply. If any questions about the selection criteria please contact: Barry Spud, CEO Safetyrisk

  • Bio
  • Latest Posts
  • More Info
Barry Spud

Barry Spud

Safety Crusader, BBS Fanatic, Zero Harm Zealot, Compliance Controller and Global Pandemic Expert at Everything Safety
Barry Spud

Latest posts by Barry Spud (see all)

  • Things To Consider When Developing And Designing Your Company SWMS - May 29, 2021
  • Bad Safety Photos - December 20, 2020
  • Why Do We Love Stupid Safety Photos - December 14, 2020
  • Barry Spud’s Hazard Control Tips - August 28, 2020
  • Researchers Reveal the Top 10 Most Effective Safety Slogans Of All Time - July 27, 2020
Barry Spud

Please share our posts

  • Click to print (Opens in new window)
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)

Related

Filed Under: Safety Professional, Safety Satire, Zero Harm

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. paul ince says

    July 10, 2020 at 11:31 AM

    At least one key KPi is missing ie, the ability and expressed desire to conduct refresher training in a hospital ward setting

    Reply
    • Rob Long says

      July 10, 2020 at 12:35 PM

      Spot on Paul, and without any training in pastoral care skills.

      Reply
    • Admin says

      July 10, 2020 at 3:11 PM

      no lost time then – And back dating signatures on all other induction and training records – I’ve seen that attempted and that safety knob get eaten alive by an injured person’s mother!

      Reply
      • Rob Long says

        July 10, 2020 at 4:39 PM

        Came out in the Kenoss case https://www.canberratimes.com.au/story/6062753/kenoss-contractors-fined-11-million-for-workplace-death/
        Foreman back signed the induction sheet but spelt the workers name wrong, came out in court that they believed that paperwork covers your arse, completely delusional.

        Reply
  2. bernardcorden says

    July 9, 2020 at 6:22 PM

    The most notable omission from its board of directors is Tom Domican.

    Reply
  3. bernardcorden says

    July 9, 2020 at 1:44 PM

    Zero integrity:

    https://www.seek.com.au/job/50200632?type=standard#searchRequestToken=efa5b88a-f761-4b6b-afdc-cf89684a0b54

    Reply
    • Rob Long says

      July 9, 2020 at 6:07 PM

      Well known as a brutalist organisation.

      Reply
  4. Rob Long says

    July 9, 2020 at 10:54 AM

    Well known in SPoR at the Messiah Complex

    Reply
  5. bernardcorden says

    July 9, 2020 at 10:21 AM

    If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: ‘President Can’t Swim.’ – Lyndon B Johnson (ChOHSProf)

    Reply
  6. Matthew Thorne says

    July 9, 2020 at 10:05 AM

    I won’t comment in case I cause harm.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

Search and Discover More on this Site

Never miss a post - Subscribe via Email

Enter your email address and join other discerning risk and safety people who receive notifications of new posts by email

Join 7,433 other subscribers

How we pay for the high cost of running of this site – try it for free on your site

NEW! Free Download

Please take our 2 minute zero survey

Recent Comments

  • Rob Long on Culture Silences in Safety – Socialitie
  • Joe Zinobile on Culture Silences in Safety – Socialitie
  • HASSAN MOHAMMED on Free Online Safety Training Courses
  • Rob Long on Safety Climate / Safety Leadership Survey
  • Ann on Safety Climate / Safety Leadership Survey
  • Rob on Near Miss or Near Hit
  • Robert Long on The Convenience of Complacency
  • patricia on Free Hotel and Resort Risk Management Checklist
  • William McGinty on The Convenience of Complacency
  • Patrick on Free Health and Safety Manual Template

FREE eBOOK DOWNLOADS

Recent Posts

  • Ritual Performance and Risk
  • Asking Better Questions in Risk
  • The Toxic Language of ‘Performance’ and Risk
  • OHS Compliance Puts Lives in Danger
  • Talking About Teams
  • The Art of Active Listening in Risk
  • Understanding The Social Psychology of Risk And Safety
  • You Market What You Believe in Safety
  • The Noise of Safety Leadership
  • That’s Not a Knife, That’s a Knife

What is Psychological Safety at Work?

Footer

Subscribe to Blog via Email

Enter your email address and join other discerning risk and safety people who receive notifications of new posts by email

Join 7,433 other subscribers

AUTHORS

  • Alan Quilley
    • Heinrich–Industrial Accident Prevention
    • The Problem With ZERO Goals and Results
  • Bernard Corden
    • After the goldrush
    • The Internationale
  • Bill Sims
    • Employee Engagement: Chocolate, Vanilla, or Strawberry?
    • Injury Hiding-How do you stop it?
  • Craig Clancy
    • Task Based vs Activity Based Safe Work Method Statements
    • Safety And Tender Submissions
  • Daniel Kirk
    • It’s easy being wise after the event.
    • A Positive Safety Story
  • Dave Whitefield
    • Safety is about…
    • Safety and Compliance
  • Dennis Millard
    • Are You Risk Intelligent?
    • Honey they get me! They get me at work!
  • Drewie
    • Downturn Doin’ Your Head In? Let’s Chat….
    • How was your break?
  • Gabrielle Carlton
    • All Care and No Care!
    • You Are Not Alone!
  • George Robotham
    • How to Give an Unforgettable Safety Presentation
    • How To Write a Safety Report
  • Goran Prvulovic
    • Safety Manager – an Ultimate Scapegoat
    • HSE Performance – Back to Basics
  • James Ellis
    • Psychological Core Stability for Wellbeing in Workers Comp
    • In search of plan B in workers’ recovery
  • James Parkinson
    • To laugh or not to laugh
    • People and Safety
  • John Toomey
    • In it for The Long Haul – Making the most of the FIFO Lifestyle
    • Who is Responsible for This?
  • Karl Cameron
    • Abby Normal Safety
    • The Right Thing
  • Ken Roberts
    • Safety Legislation Is Our Biggest Accident?
    • HSE Trip Down Memory Lane
  • Mark Perrett
    • Psychology of Persuasion: Top 5 influencing skills for getting what you want
  • Mark Taylor
    • Build a Psychologically Safe Workplace by Taking Risks and Analysing Failures
    • Enculturing Safety
  • Max Geyer
    • WHS Legislation is NOT about Safety it’s about Culture
    • Due Diligence Is Not Just Ticking Boxes!
  • Matt Thorne
    • Safety Culture–Hudson’s Model
    • Culture – Edgar Schein
  • Peter Ribbe
    • Is there “Common Sense” in safety?
    • Who wants to be a safety professional?
  • Phil LaDuke
    • Professional Conferences Are A Sleazy Con
    • Hey Idiots, You’re Worried About the Wrong Things
  • Admin
    • OHS Compliance Puts Lives in Danger
    • Talking About Teams
  • Dr Rob Long
    • Ritual Performance and Risk
    • Asking Better Questions in Risk
  • Rob Sams
    • The Learning (and unlearning) that Revealed my Vocation
    • I’m just not that into safety anymore
  • Barry Spud
    • Things To Consider When Developing And Designing Your Company SWMS
    • Bad Safety Photos
  • Sheri Suckling
    • How Can I Get the Boss to Listen?
  • Simon Cassin
    • Safety values, ideas, behaviours and clothes
  • Safety Nerd
    • The Block isn’t portraying safety as it should be
    • Toolbox Talk Show–PPE
  • Wynand Serfontein
    • Why The Problem With Learning Is Unlearning
    • I DON’T KNOW
  • Zoe Koskinas
    • Why is fallibility so challenging in the workplace?

Top Posts & Pages

  • BEST WORKPLACE HEALTH and SAFETY SLOGANS 2022
  • Road Safety Slogans 2022
  • COVID-19 (Coronavirus, Omicron) Health and Safety Slogans and Quotes for the Workplace
  • Free Safety Moments Examples, Tips and Resources
  • 15 Safety Precautions When Working With Electricity
  • CATCHY and FUNNY SAFETY SLOGANS FOR THE WORKPLACE
  • Download Safety Moments from Human Resources Secretariat
  • Free Risk Assessment Template in Excel Format
  • CLASSIC, FAMOUS and INFAMOUS SAFETY QUOTES
  • FREE RISK ASSESSMENT FORMS, TEMPLATES and APPS

Most commented on

Forecasting Safety

The Banned Objects Index – A New Development in Safety Culture

Dumbs for Safety

The Real Barriers to Safety

Safety as Faith Healing

Who Said We Don’t Need Systems?

How to use signs, symbols and text effectively in communicating about risk

Why Safety Controls Don’t Always Work

Safety Should NOT Be About Safety

Why Personify Safety?

FEATURED POSTS

Tape Down Those Leads

Adverse Events: Eliminate or Anticipate?

Safety Leadership Training

Just Hangin’ Out…

Making Sense of Semiotics and Safety

The Illusion Of Hazard Identification

Post Graduate Studies in the Social Psychology of Risk

Starting Points, Worldviews and Risk

Critical Thinking and Questioning in Safety

The Heart of Wisdom at Covid Time

Risk Intelligence, Thinking and Decision Making

Learning Wisdom from the Collective Unconscious

Investigations and Power

Safety and Risk Culture Cloud

A Question of Ethics

Speaking a New Language in Safety

The Challenge of Social Sensemaking in Risk

The Allure of Submission

Daydreaming and Safety

Celebrating 1000 Blogs on Risk

More Posts from this Category

Subscribe to Blog via Email

Enter your email address and join other discerning risk and safety people who receive notifications of new posts by email

Join 7,433 other subscribers

How we pay for the high cost of running of this site – try it for free on your site

 

How To Make Your Own Hand Sanitizer

 

 

How to Make your own Covid-19 Face Mask

 

Covid-19 Returning To Work Safety, Transitioning, Start Up And Re Entry Plans

 

How’s the Hot Desking Going Covid?

imageOne of the benefits of the Covid-19 epidemic is a total rethink about how we live and work (https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-03-28/coronavirus-could-reshape-how-australians-work-forever/12097124 ).

Expertise by Regurgitation and Re-Badging

One of the fascinating things about the Coronavirus pandemic is watching Safety morph into epidemiology expertise. I would like a dollar for every flyer, presentation, podcast, powerpoint, checklist template, toolbox talk and poster set that had jumped into my inbox… Read the rest

The Stress of Stasis

One of the challenging things about the Coronavirus crisis is stasis. For those without work and confined to home, for those in self-isolation, it’s like life is frozen in time. ‘Stay at home’ is the mantra. The trouble is, in… Read the rest