The Bunnings Banger Bungle
No wonder people think that safety is the industry of stupidity. Oh, here comes the safety nerd, the dork wrapped in orgiastic delight in the myth of hyper-safety. Here comes the risk averse wrecker and fun police worried about petty pissy safety (https://safetyrisk.net/petty-pissy-zero-harm/) whilst real risk (https://www.humandymensions.com/product/real-risk/) remains ignored. Petty pissy hyper-safety has no idea about proportionality, Due Diligence or cultural nuance. Both are present in this silly decision made by Bunnings (https://www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2018/nov/13/bunnings-hits-snag-with-ridiculous-sausage-sizzle-safety-rule?CMP=Share_iOSApp_Other; https://www.3aw.com.au/bizarre-new-bunnings-sausage-rule-introduced-due-to-ohs-concerns/ ).
If you are looking for a lack of proportionality in safety go no further than this Bunnings decision. The instruction to put onions first is now a safety hazard apparently, because hyper-safety is much more worried about slips trips and falls than actually killing people.
Of course the rhetoric of hyper-safety is that ‘safety is our number 1 priority’. This was invoked by Bunnings in this instance. Ha, of course it isn’t, it’s making money. How crazy that Safety invokes these silly mantras that mean nothing because some safety crusader is hungry for power (or less onions).
If safety was the number 1 priority they wouldn’t sell half of the dangerous cheap s*#t they stock their shelves with. I mean if safety is their number 1 priority, why are their car parks so dangerous, mixing trucks and cars with pedestrians wandering about??? If safety was their number 1 priority then why are dodgy cheap products sold as a priority??? The rhetoric of hyper-safety is absolute nonsense and the public know it. And it is clear that the nonsense language of ‘zero harm’ drives this attraction to focusing on petty pissy safety. If you want to make people hate safety, then copy this Bunnings decision and watch the toxicity rise on social media. Here are some of the social media comments that serve as an indictment of petty pissy safety:
- How many people have died or injured slipping on onions at a Bunnings stall? Ambos must be stationed at every stall is next on the agenda.
- Bunnings sell bubble wrap right? Lets go buy rolls of this to cover ourselves with. FFS this is beyond madness now. Why dont we serve the sauce frozen in cups cause that might fall out too. Another great example of why Australia is so messed up.
- It’s my biggest fear when going to Bunnings, the number of onions i have tripped over… my lord, every freakin sunday….
- What an outrage! Onion first? What’s next, cheese before the patty on a burger. OH&S gone mad #Bunnings #sausagegate #onionoppression
- For real I thought 3.50 made up some OH&S garbage to cause outrage. This is BEYOND ridiculous.
*goes to Bunnings to buy pitchforks*
*stands outside Bunnings to protest, with said pitchforks*
- I thought Bunnings sold tools. This ruling proves that they are a pack of tools. Onions first or last, when you roll up the bread it ends up in the same place. But a qualified Tradesman would be able to work that out.
In the strange world of lack-of-leadership-safety is a complete disconnect with cultural symbols in Australian culture. Virgin recently learned this tough lesson in cultural symbolism with its crazy idea of referencing Veterans on flights (https://www.smh.com.au/business/companies/virgin-australia-reconsiders-veteran-salutes-following-backlash-20181105-p50e5b.html ). Playing the safety card against cultural symbols will never work and only demonstrates that the industry doesn’t know what culture is. Oh yes, that’s right. Its ‘what we do around here’, probably the most pathetic definition of culture that’s spoken in safety but gold for behaviourists.
Playing with the sacred sausage sizzle is a loss-sum game for Bunnings exposing hyper-safety as the new joke on the block.
It’s about time Safety stopped talking nonsense to people, safety can never be a number 1 priority as if other matters come 2nd, 3rd or 4th. The idea of prioritisation in safety spin is madness. All elements of business are a priority and if profit, HR, customer service etc isn’t of equal importance then there will be no business.
Unfortunately, hyper-safety doesn’t understand the core principle of ALARP (https://vimeo.com/162637292 ). Safety should be about proportionality not risk aversion.
Petty pissy safety is about a lack of proportionality and the public know how to smash such hypocrisy when it smells it. My god, just think of all the procedure manuals that will have to be re-written because of this catastrophic risk of onions second (https://bruthen.vic.lions.org.au/files/bruthen.vic/Bunnings%20Sausage%20Sizzle%20Procedures.pdf)