RU Ok – A Conversation About Helping
This week on 3 Small Chat Rooms we talk to Robert Sams CEO of Lifeline Direct, with a focus on mental health being it is World Suicide Prevention day and RUOK? Day this week. This is a great conversation and we hope we can actually come back to Rob and have an extended version.
There is so much to take away from even this little snippet we hope you enjoy, learn and contribute to the conversation.
What happens when someone says “No”. What are you really asking, what are you prepared for? Do you have empathy, self awareness and compassion?
This stuff ain’t in the WHS Curriculum!
Rob Sams says
Thanks for the chat Dave and Matthew.
One of the real learnings for me during my time with Lifeline Australia is reflecting on the three key attributes (and of course there are more than three…) that we look for in our Crisis Supporters, that is; Empathy, Self-awareness and Compassion.
Empathy is about being open to the feelings of others, at Lifeline we aim to validate feelings in a way that is non-judgemental.
Self-awareness is about being open to who we are in the conversation and what we bring into it – how do we suspend our own agenda?
Compassion, which as I mentioned in our chat, has at its (Latin) roots, a meaning that is about ‘suffering together’. That is, to resist the temptation to fix or end the suffering of others and instead, accept it, sit with it, and hold space with the person.
It can feel counter-intuitive in a world where we often struggle with the idea of ‘suffering’, yet at the same time, it’s so important for our ‘being’.
The paradox of helping?
If we can get our head around these three things, perhaps that would lead to better helping?
I’d welcome a further chat.
Samsy
Rob Long says
Thanks for the video. Not a big fan of RUOK, feeds into tokenism too much for me.
I’m a much bigger fan of Lifeline and commend you to chatting to Rob. I like to focus on what is doable not some slogan and Lifeline are all about doability.
Having worked in Community Services for some time I can tell you that the politicization of the sector is just as woeful as safety. So hard to weed out the crusaders. The last thing safety or community services needs is heroes, saviours, heroes or crusaders.